I was recently struck with not just how different my life is now from before I had children, but how different I was as a person. There are times I wonder if the 22 year old me would recognize himself in the me of today at 45 years old.
Back then I smoked, but that’s the least of the changes (I quit smoking before kids). Having kids has altered my daily activities, and the path that I find myself on is very different from what I had initially thought for myself.
My hopes and plans as well as actual expectations were dashed, not because of children, but simply circumstances. Nothing bad, but things change.
As people we grow, change, transform, adapt, whatever. What we thought was cool and an absolute necessity turns out to not be worth our time. Some things change while others son’t. It is only in retrospect we can fully recognize this.
20 years ago I wouldn’t have considered myself a sports fan. I had been to two professional baseball games in my life up until then. One was because relatives from Ireland had come over and wanted to see a baseball game, and the other was simply because The Beach Boys were playing a concert after the game.
Over the last 3 seasons I’ve been to more baseball games than I can remember off the top of my head. And I’ve had a great time. I’ve begun paying attention to Spring Training and roster moves.
Now, I’ve always been a soccer fan, and it is still my favorite sport. I don’t pay attention to it as much as I should or would like to, but that’s where my heart is, and to say I get excited about the World Cup would be an understatement. Over the last few years I’ve been able to take some of my kids to a few Sounders FC games, and that has been great.
These are examples of where certain things change and some don’t. 20 years ago while the Mariners were finally beginning to enjoy having some winning seasons I really couldn’t care about the team. It wasn’t until 3 years ago that I started caring about the team and over the course of the past 3 (losing) seasons I’ve become more and more of a fan.
I enjoy taking my kids to the games, but I’m at a point where I would like to go by myself. This isn’t something I would have considered 20 years ago.
Another change? I use a Crock Pot at least once if not twice a week. 20 years ago I didn’t own one. Or how about religion? 20 years ago the thought of going back to church was abhorrent to me, and now we go regularly as a family.
So much has stayed the same. I’m still a Doctor Who fan. I still like my music loud. If I could subsist on nothing but chocolate and Guinness I would.
What does this have to do with anything? Not much. Everything. I don’t know. I was just struck this morning by how different I am as a person than 20 years ago, yet still the same.